Attachment-Based Therapy in London & Burlington, Ontario

In-person counselling in London and Burlington, with online therapy across Ontario.

If trust, closeness, conflict or asking for support feels difficult, therapy can offer space to understand the patterns showing up in your relationships.

Both therapists are accepting new clients, with no current waitlist. Free parking is available at both offices.

Book a Free 15-Minute Consultation

What Is Attachment-Based Therapy?

Attachment-based therapy is a broad way of understanding patterns in close relationships, including how we experience trust, closeness, conflict and support. It draws on attachment theory developed by psychologist John Bowlby, while also considering the relationships and circumstances in your life today.

An attachment-informed approach may be one part of a therapist’s broader work rather than a separate, fixed program. Earlier experiences may be explored where relevant, alongside present concerns and goals. The work may include noticing emotional responses, expressing needs and boundaries, and talking about how it feels to speak openly with your therapist, including questions or misunderstandings.

Exploring attachment does not mean deciding that your childhood caused everything you are experiencing now. Current relationships, stressors, coping patterns and goals matter too. The purpose is to understand what may be happening with more context and curiosity, then decide what would be useful to work on together.

A note on terminology: This broader attachment-informed perspective is different from Attachment-Based Family Therapy (ABFT), which is a specific named treatment program.

Understanding Attachment Patterns

Attachment styles are one way of describing patterns that can show up around closeness, independence, reassurance and trust. You may recognize parts of yourself in more than one pattern, and the way you respond can also differ from one relationship to another.

Secure Attachment

You may generally feel comfortable with both closeness and independence. Asking for support, trusting another person and working through disagreement may feel manageable, even when a relationship is under stress.

Anxious Attachment

You may notice heightened worry when someone feels distant, uncertainty about where you stand, or a strong desire for reassurance. Small changes in communication or connection can sometimes feel especially significant.

Avoidant Attachment

You may place a strong value on independence, pull back when emotions become intense, or find it difficult to depend on another person. Sharing vulnerable feelings or asking for help may feel uncomfortable.

Fearful or Mixed Attachment Patterns

You may want closeness while also feeling wary of it. This can sometimes look like moving toward connection and then creating distance when the relationship begins to feel vulnerable, uncertain or emotionally intense.

Attachment patterns are descriptions, not diagnoses. The terminology can vary between attachment models, and a label matters less than understanding the patterns that are affecting you now.

TRUST, CLOSENESS & CONNECTION

When Relationship Patterns Bring You to Therapy

You do not need to know your attachment style before starting therapy. Sometimes it begins with simply noticing that the same relationship difficulties keep showing up.

Perhaps you keep revisiting an argument long after it ends. Perhaps asking for help feels harder than handling everything yourself. Or a relationship matters to you, but you are unsure how to stay connected while protecting your boundaries.

These are worthwhile concerns to bring into therapy. You might want to explore trust after a difficult experience, feel more able to express a need, or understand what happens when closeness starts to feel uncomfortable.

Your identity, culture, relationships and current circumstances belong in that conversation. There is no need to arrive with a particular explanation for what you are feeling.

You might bring this into therapy if…

You find yourself needing frequent reassurance or worrying about where you stand.
You pull back when conversations become emotionally close or intense.
The same conflict or trust issue seems to repeat across relationships.
Asking for support, expressing a need or setting a boundary feels especially difficult.

Relationship concerns can be explored in individual therapy. If the concern involves a partner or family relationship, you can also learn more about couples counselling and family therapy. Which format makes sense should be discussed with your therapist rather than assumed from an attachment label.

WHAT THE WORK MAY LOOK LIKE

What Attachment-Informed Work Can Involve

There is no single session plan that applies to everyone. When attachment is part of the work, a therapist may help you explore expectations about relationships and how those expectations show up in the present.

Notice What Happens Between You and Others

A starting point might be a recent conversation: what happened, what you expected, how you felt and what you did next. This gives you something concrete to discuss, without needing to explain your entire history at once.

Put Needs and Boundaries into Words

You might explore what you needed in that moment and what made it difficult to say. A goal could be asking for reassurance more directly, explaining a boundary or finding words for feelings you usually keep private.

Pay Attention to the Therapy Relationship

Feeling unsure about speaking openly, disagreeing or asking a question can be part of the conversation with a therapist too. Clear professional boundaries and discussion of misunderstandings matter in this work.

A SIMPLE EXAMPLE

After an unanswered message, someone might notice an urge to send several more messages or stop responding altogether. In therapy, that situation could open a conversation about uncertainty, expectations and other possible responses.

This is an illustration, not a client story or a prediction about your experience. The methods used should be explained in relation to your goals, and you can ask how a therapist uses attachment ideas and what other approaches they might recommend.

GETTING STARTED

What to Expect in Your First Session

Your first session does not require you to tell your whole story or arrive knowing exactly what you want to work on. It is a chance to begin talking about what brought you in, ask questions and get a sense of what working together could look like.

Start With What Brought You In

You can begin with what has been happening recently, what feels difficult or what you would like to understand better. You can share at a pace that feels manageable rather than trying to cover every relationship or past experience in one meeting.

Explore What Feels Relevant

The conversation may include current relationships, patterns you have noticed, earlier experiences that feel relevant or questions about attachment. You can also ask about the therapist’s approach and raise anything that feels unclear or uncomfortable.

Discuss What Comes Next

Before the session ends, you can talk about what you would like to focus on, whether the approach feels like a good fit and what the next step might be. Goals and the pace of therapy can continue to develop over time.

The goal of the first session is not to finish the story. It is to begin understanding what matters to you and whether working together feels useful.

MEET THE TEAM

Meet Our Therapists

Choosing a therapist is personal. Location, the people a therapist works with and how comfortable you feel learning about their approach can all help you decide where to begin.

LONDON, ONTARIO

Hannah Steyaert

M.A., Registered Psychotherapist

Hannah works from our London location with teens, young adults, adults, couples and families. Her full profile shares more about her background, therapeutic approach and the concerns she works with.

London: 226-970-2861

View Hannah’s Profile

BURLINGTON, ONTARIO

Hailey Steyaert

M.A., Registered Psychotherapist

Hailey works from our Burlington location with teens, adults, couples and families. Her full profile shares more about her background, therapeutic approach and the concerns she works with.

Burlington: 647-970-1790

View Hailey’s Profile

Not sure who to contact? You do not need to choose a therapist before reaching out. Our general inquiry form later on this page can be used if you have questions or are unsure where to start.

IN-PERSON & ONLINE OPTIONS

Counselling in London, Burlington and Online Across Ontario

Steyaert Counselling offers in-person appointments from our London and Burlington offices, along with online therapy across Ontario. The right format can depend on your location, preferences and what you want to discuss in therapy.

LONDON

In-Person Counselling in London

Hannah Steyaert practices from our London office. If you prefer meeting face to face, the London location page has more information about the practice and visiting the office.

Learn about our London location

BURLINGTON

In-Person Counselling in Burlington

Hailey Steyaert practices from our Burlington office. The Burlington location page has more information if you are looking for in-person counselling in Burlington or the surrounding area.

Learn about our Burlington location

ACROSS ONTARIO

Online Therapy Across Ontario

Online therapy can be an option if you live elsewhere in Ontario or simply prefer meeting from a private space at home. Our online therapy page explains more about virtual appointments and what you need to get started.

Learn about online therapy in Ontario

If you are unsure which location or format makes the most sense, you can ask during a consultation or use the general inquiry form below.

COMMON QUESTIONS

Questions About Attachment-Based Therapy

You do not need to understand all of the terminology before reaching out. These answers cover some of the questions people commonly have when deciding whether attachment-informed therapy may be worth discussing.

No. You can start with what you are experiencing rather than a label. You might describe a difficult conversation, a concern about trust or a pattern you have noticed. A questionnaire or article cannot tell the whole story of your relationships.

Attachment patterns can change. Research on adult psychotherapy has found increases in attachment security and reductions in attachment anxiety in some studies, while findings about avoidance have been less clear. That does not predict what will happen for one person. It is more useful to identify the changes that matter to you and review them as therapy progresses.

No approach is right for everyone. Attachment-informed work is a broad description, so the methods used, your concerns and the therapist’s relevant experience all matter. Research on one named treatment cannot establish the effectiveness of every approach that uses attachment ideas. You can ask what the therapist recommends for your situation and why.

There is no reliable session count that applies to everyone seeking help with attachment concerns. Your priorities, the proposed approach, appointment frequency and cost can all affect the plan. You and your therapist can review what is useful as your needs and goals become clearer.

Not necessarily. Relationship concerns can be explored in individual therapy. Couples and family sessions are different formats with their own goals and participation arrangements. Discuss what you are hoping to work on with the therapist before deciding who should attend.

No. Attachment-Based Family Therapy, often shortened to ABFT, is a specific treatment developed for adolescents experiencing depression or suicidal thoughts and their families. An attachment-informed perspective can be used more broadly and does not, by itself, mean a therapist provides ABFT. Ask about the specific approach being offered rather than assuming the terms mean the same thing.

No. Attachment-style language describes patterns in relationships. Reactive Attachment Disorder and Disinhibited Social Engagement Disorder are separate childhood diagnoses that require appropriate assessment. General attachment-informed counselling should not be confused with coercive holding or rebirthing practices.

You can ask about this during a consultation. Steyaert Counselling offers online therapy across Ontario, but your therapist should discuss whether your concerns, circumstances and preferred way of meeting are a suitable fit. Online access does not mean every service or appointment format is available with every clinician.

Fees depend on the therapist and session type you are considering. You can review our therapy fees and insurance information before booking. Insurance coverage depends on your plan, so check whether Registered Psychotherapists are covered and whether your policy has limits or referral requirements.

READY WHEN YOU ARE

Book a Free 15-Minute Consultation

A free consultation gives you a chance to ask questions, talk briefly about what brings you to therapy and consider whether the available options feel like a good fit.

Book a Free 15-Minute Consultation

The booking system begins by asking you to choose London or Burlington. Review the consultation and appointment options shown before confirming.

HAVE A QUESTION?

Contact Us Before Booking

Have a question or unsure where to start? Send us an inquiry below. We review messages and forward them based on your location or preferred therapist. If you have a preference, please mention it.

You do not need to include a detailed personal or clinical history in your first message. Sending an inquiry does not reserve an appointment.

Prefer to call? London and general inquiries: 226-970-2861 | Burlington: 647-970-1790